 |
Net Gains (Jul 21, 98) |
Exciting newsflash - just as the column goes to press - the way
has been cleared for private ISPs to offer Internet connectivity
in India. Let's hear it for the court ruling - Hip, Hip, Hooray
!!! More on this in the weeks to come…
On a sadder note, I recently discovered that
I've got exactly twelve years to live - my scheduled date of death
is Wednesday, July 21st, 2010. And that's a sadistic
estimate. Going by a more normal estimate, I've got 49 years left
- D-Day being Sunday, July 21st, 2047. If I'm just
plain pessimistic, I've got less than 39 years of life on God's
good earth. Why this sudden fascination with death ?
No, there's no astrologer or palmist who's
made these predictions - those chappies are too much of a waste
of time and money. A simpler, and more hi-tech option for us cyber-junkies,
and it's called Death Clock (http://deathclock.com).
To log in to The Death Clock, you'll need
a JavaScript capable browser, such as Netscape 2.02 (or better)
or Internet Explorer 3.0. Not being able to access the site however,
does not mean that you'll live forever! All you need to feed this
site is your date of birth and your gender, and voila! one click
later, you're countdown clock starts ticking, reminding you that
it's just a matter of a few billion seconds before you meet the
creator. You have the option of choosing the kind of estimate
you want - normal, pessimistic or sadistic - your life span varies
accordingly.
If you're not satisfied with this one time
reminder, or if you're really really sadistic, the site offers
you a downloadable screen saver that can constantly remind you
how longer your ticker will tick.
Other deadly ways to spend some time on this
site, include looking up death dates of celebrities (some of them
already long gone). The current stars are the Spice Girls, so
all you Spicy fans (and haters) may want to look this section
up. The site also gives you the option of being a nice friend
(or fiend, as the case may be), and warn people you know about
their imminent death, and the time they have left with you. Just
key in their email addresses and they are invited to the site
to find out their life expectancy. A good alternative to usual
boring birthday or valentine's day cards. The faint hearted are
warned against visiting the site.
The Death Clock uses a very simple way of
figuring out how many seconds you have left to live. First it
figures out how old you are, then it takes that number and subtracts
it from an average life span (one for men, one for women). It
takes that number and then converts it into seconds.
The Death Clock was suggested by Net Gains
reader Alpesh Nakar (http://members.tripod.com/~nakar_as/).
Another site you can visit for your life expectancy
asks you for more details - http://logic.csc.cuhk.edu.hk/~s965092/life.htm.
This online calculator takes into consideration things like family
and medical history, and your lifestyle and after a few seconds
of calculation announces its verdict - I'm gonna live till 56,
according to this site.
If any of these things do frighten you, maybe
it's time to point your mouse at http://www.licindia.com/ - the
website of our very own Life Insurance Corporation and find out
a policy that would your dependants paisa vasool.
We'll let Woody Allen wrap it up for us this
week : "It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't
want to be there when it happens."
If you've still got a few days left to live, make the most of
it - for instance by winning free tickets for movies like Godzilla
and Firestorm. Log on to www.rediff.com